Friday, October 31, 2008




HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

It is a gorgeous day here with the sun shining and mild temperatures.
I am feeling good! I didn't feel the greatest last night, just felt icky. Food has taken on somewhat of a strange taste in my mouth right now, so I haven't eaten much. Layed on the couch and watched TV all night. This morning I am feeling a little lightheaded but nothing intolerable. I am off the steroids now so that wired feeling should go away.
I am at home catching up on housework, laundry and errands. So far so good! I am waiting for something to hit me. Hopefully it won't.

Once again, thank you for all the emails, phone messages, texts, cards, gifts and FOOD! I am overwhelmed again with everyone's generosity!!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Day After

Guess what? My hair fell out last night, completely bald. hahaha Just kidding.

I am feeling good today so far! I took a Benadryl last night and slept really well. I took my steroid and anti-nausea meds and have my new piece of jewelery on, my anti-nausea wrist band, that my friend Linda got me. Hey, I will try anything that might fight off nausea. I am feeling a little wired from the steroid but today is the last day of that med. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed as the day goes on that I continue to feel good.

On a side note, our dog Sunny has been having some problems with what we thought was her hip. John had taken her hunting last weekend and she is now three-legged. She will not put any weight on her back leg, so another vet visit was necessary. We are pretty sure she has torn her ACL in her knee. She will have an x-ray to see if anything else is going on in the leg and then surgery to follow to repair the tear. The vet was pretty sure that this was the problem. That will be next week Thursday.
She is the sweetest family dog and a great hunting companion. I hate to put her through a surgery but she has to walk, so we really do not have any choice.
Poor baby!!!!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Feel the Fear/Chemo #1




My SIL, Debbie, gave me this "courage" stone shortly after I was diagnosed.
I took the stone along with me to chemo this morning and kept it in my pocket. It will go with me for all my chemo treatments. Yesterday I was feeling pretty nervous about the chemo (who wouldn't be nervous about having toxic drugs pumped into your system) and when I took the box out last night to put the stone in my hospital bag I saw the message written on the box "feel the fear and do it anyway" Well, that pretty much says it all, doesn't it??!!! I left the house this morning ready to go!! Thanks Debbie. It was the perfect gift for the perfect time!



I was at the cancer center bright and early just to catch a nice sunrise coming up over the lake.



I arrived at he cancer center at 7:15 for labs where they drew my blood and then placed on IV line in my wrist. I then had an oncologist meeting at 8:30 with Dr. Charlson and his nurse just to go over what was going to happen and check my labs. He is super doctor and his nurse is really great also. Everyone I encountered today was wonderful. My chemo started pretty much on time and the great news was that it was only going to take 3 hours, not the 5 hours like they had originally said. Premeds included another dose of a steroid, anti nausea (15 minutes total) and then the Taxotere (dripped for one hour) and Cytoxan (dripped for another hour). I sat in a nice lounger and read for most of the time in between a few phone calls and some text messages. It was pretty uneventful, which is a good thing! I left feeling not any different than when I arrived. I stopped at Panera and grabbed some soup and I am home. I will know in about 3 days what side effects will hit me. Both my doc and nurse think I will have no problems with the combination of drugs. One down three to go. Yippeee!!

I would like ask for some prayers for 3 people that I know. (I won't use their names for their privacy) The first person is sort of a distant family member who is having a bilateral mastectomy today for breast cancer. The other is a mom who I ran into this morning at the day hospital that I know personally and has a recurrence of cancer 5 years out. We were both very surprised to see each other there! The third is a good friend of ours who is battling prostate cancer and has gone through some radiation and will require some more shortly. I am finding out more and more every day about people that I know that are having to deal with cancer. It makes me very sad. Please pray for these people as they fight! Thank you!!!

Tuesday

Did you see the snow yesterday? Omggg, twice during the day I saw those dreaded snow flakes falling outside. Unfortunately my camera battery was dead or I would have taken a pic and posted as the first snow of the year. It is wayyyy to early for that nonsense. And after last year, I don't care if the ground is ever covered this entire winter. Wishful thinking isn't it??!!

I did a quick shopping run this morning for some last minute items before "C" day tommorrow. Lipstick (a woman can never have enough lipstick), Biotene mouthwash to use during chemo treatments to prevent mouth sores, soft toothbrushes (chemo does a number on your mouth and gums), stool softeners (chemo plays havoc with your intestines) Halloween candy for the 6 Trick or Treaters we will have, and last but not least hats! I honestly have never bought a hat for myself in my life. I hate wearing things on my head, but I have a feeling a might need a little warmth on my head this winter. My friend Sara said I will want to sleep with something on my head at night because I will be cold. I found the softest hats they had and even bought a crazy cheetah hat. Will I wear it? Who knows? LOLOL I am venturing into uncharted territory.

Here is my schedule for tommorrow: labs at 7:15, oncology appointment 8:30, chemo starts at 9:30. The treatment will last about 5 hours. I should be home mid afternoon. I will post late tommmorrow when the day is over and let you know how the chemo treatment went and how I tolerated my chemo cocktail. Cheers!

Monday, October 27, 2008

PROGRESS FINALLY!

I had an early morning appointment with Dr. John. The bad news is the few remaining stitches are still in (no biggie,they are just ugly) but the great news is that he actually did a fill on that side. It was only 50 cc, but none the less it is progress! I will be seeing him every week for a small fill until we can get the skin stretched out to the size of the other boob. I am not sure how long that will take, but it will be awhile. UGhhhhh!

I am trying to drink a ton of water before chemo starts. I am supposed to drink like a gallon a day! Who the heck can drink that much anyways?? I am not a big water drinker anyways so this is a challenge for me. So far, I am not doing very well today. LOLOL Guess I need to step it up a bit!

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Sports Day

Well, today marks the end of my son's career as a junior football player. Next year he will start high school. He mentioned to me in the car last night that he is really "bummed" that football is over. Thankfully he did not have any major injuries this year. I fear for his life when he plays! LOL He is not a very big kid. My husband says "thank god he is fast" (meaning he can run from these big boys) Over the past years he has had so much fun despite the fact that they have won very few games. Hitting, kicking, being stepped on, thrown to the ground, pancaked to the ground, hit in the ribs, hit in the back, abrasions, cuts, black and blue marks, ankle pain, leg pain, back pain, pushing. Why does he love this sport so much? I am not really sure. I guess only a football player can answer that. I am headed to the last game of the season this morning. (my husband will be jumping for joy that his football coaching career is over. Not that he hasn't enjoyed it, but it has taken so much of his free time over the past several years, he is ready to retire). Unfortunately, the team has not won a game this season, lets cross our fingers and hope for the best (actually we need to pray that they win. hahaha)

Another huge part of our family is the swimming pool. Over the past 9 years we have endured hundreds of hours sitting in a 90 degree sauna,sweating,waiting for our daughter to swim in a race. Let me paint a picture for you. Warm ups at 7:00 am, meet starts at 8:00 am, daughter's first race is at 10:00. She is in the water for approximately 26 seconds for a 50 freestyle. Wait another hour for her to swim. Then there are relays. Meet ends at 12:30. You get the picture. She is in high school swimming right now, so thankfully the meets are short, only about 2 hours. Today is a relay only meet held at the pool where she is a club swimmer. It is a fun meet for the girls. We are headed there this afternoon.

Enjoy your Saturday!

ps I was getting tired of the old look of my blog, so I needed to change it. Hope you like it!

5 days until chemo starts!

Friday, October 24, 2008

Six Weeks Postop


New Clinical Cancer Center, Froedert Hospital

I am six weeks out of my main surgery, four weeks from the second surgery. It is hard to believe that that much time has passed, although some days seemed very long. When the surgeon's nurse told me during my preop consultation that I was not going to feel like myself until about 5-6 weeks out of surgery I thought to myself "nah, not me." I do have to say, she was right. Not that I have not been feeling good, but just not myself (tired, not sleeping that good, etc.) I am really feeling like my old self this week. I went in for some physical therapy yesterday on my arms and I can't tell you how much better my arms and upper body feel. The muscles in your back and arms get tight and shorten when they are not used as much, and once she worked me over, I really felt good. For the most part, this really has not been all that terrible. Recuperating from the surgery was not that bad. The pain was minimal. Tiny things annoyed me more than anything; seams in a camisole that hit me in the wrong place, stitches from the drains when they were in, seat belts that hit you right across your chest, pain in my armpits from reaching up in the cabinet for dishes, not being able to use my Pampered Chef apple corer to core an apple (I didn't have the strength to push down on the darn thing), pain in my arms when trying to close my trunk on my car. I thought it would be worse. Despite the crappy hospital exerperience I had, the crappy care from my breast surgeon whom I have fired (long story, don't want to go there) and the major complication from the surgery with an added surgery, I really feel lucky and am grateful that I am where I am today! I feel very confident in the medical team that I have now as I move forward. I am in the hands of a great plastic surgeon and oncologist and moving on to the next phase of treatment.

I need to add another thank you to all of my friends and family who are supporting me! I couldn't be doing this without all of you!

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Hair!



For those of you who know me, my hair is sacred. I never leave the house until it has been shampooed, dried, gelled and sprayed. This whole losing my hair thing is going to be pretty traumatic for me. I am envisioning a major melt down when it happens. I intend to shave me head when it starts to happen. Everyone has told me "shave it so you are taking control, don't let it take control of you." Ok, well we will see if that strategy works. I don't envision myself as being a beautiful bald woman, and I doubt that most you will ever see me bald. I am not just not that kind of person. I may eat my words, but that is the feeling that I have right now. I have been putting it off and dreading the wig shopping, but I did go yesterday and meet with Lisa in Menomonee Falls for a "wig consultation." She works out of Froedert Hospital and the Small Stones shop and also has a salon in the Falls on Main Street near our business, so I ran over there during my lunch hour to meet with her.
I only tried on 3 wigs! She has been a hair stylist for over 20 years and being a 10-year breast cancer survivor herself has gotten into the wig portion of styling. I would highly recommend her. She was very sweet and knows her stuff. I thought it was going to be difficult, but I really did not have too much trouble finding something that I liked. She is going to order the wig in the right color (trying to match my hair color as much as possible). I will see her next week for a "fitting." It was pretty weird trying on hair! I have worn the same style for several years, and it was just really strange to see me in a different hair style and different colors. That being said, I won't tell you what it looks like, but you may be surprised!!!! LOLOL Living on the edge, why not???? Change is good!!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Carrot, Egg and Coffee

Today was actually the first day I really could not think of anything to post. Yeah, me with nothing to say, unbelievable isn't it??!
I read this email tonight when I got home from work and thought this was the perfect thing to post on my blog. Thanks MJ!

A carrot, an egg, and a cup of coffee...You will never look at a cup of
coffee the same way again.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how
things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it
and wanted to give up, She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed
as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and
placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she
placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed
ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots
out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a
bowl.Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her
daughter,she asked, ' Tell me what you see.'

'Carrots, eggs, and coffee,' she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and
noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg
and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg.

Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter
smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, 'What does it
mean, mother?'

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same
adversity:boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in
strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling
water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer
shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the
boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were
unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they
had changed the water.

'Which are you?' she asked her daughter. 'When adversity knocks on your
door,how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain
and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat?
Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial
hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my
shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff
spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the
very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases
the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their
worst,you get better and change the situation around you.
When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate
yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an
egg or a coffee bean?

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Scar Project/Photos

Below is a link that is posted on the Komen message boards. It a black and white photo shoot of women who have survived breast cancer. There are no words to even describe the feeling that this photo shoot portrays. I found them to be beautiful!

**If you are sensitive to nude photos or do not want to see images of scars and breastless women this may not be the post for you to view.

http:www.davidjayphotography/TheSCARProject

Monday, October 20, 2008

Thought for The Day

True friendships are characterized by grace,truth, forgiveness, unselfishness, boundaries,care and love in gigantic and mutual proportion.
~Luci Swindoll~
from the book Laughter and Latte, a Joyful Inspiration for Women (thank you Debbie!)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

This and That

Things on the to-do list:
1. Clean up the horrible mess from sewing for the last several weeks. Threads, pins, patterns, fabric everywhere.
2. Wash. Why must they try something on and then throw it in the wash? Don't they know I just fold it and put it right back in the basket. LOL
3. Make a trip to JoAnnes and get fabric for some scarves and hats for my soon to be bald head. :( (can you tell I am dreading this?)
4. Vacuum the mounds of dog hair in the house.
5. Get book club book.
6. Take a nap!!!! (I am tired today)
7. Download Homecoming photos and order.
8. Pick up prescriptions as I never got there the other day.
9. Buy cat food. Why are cats so damn finicky? She eats the food one day and then turns her nose up at me the next day as if to say "You've got to be kidding. You expect me to eat THAT." Believe me, I have tried every cat food out there. She can eat the dried stuff if she is going to be that fussy. I am not running a restaurant here. LOL

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Road Trip to Oshkosh




Today I had the pleasure of meeting up with some other Wisconsin breast cancer survivors from the Susan Komen message boards. Sara and I drove up to Oshkosh to meet Barb and Laura and had lunch at Fratellos Waterfront Restaurant. Our stories are all different, our treatments are all different. Some of us are starting treatment,out of treatment,ending treatment, yet we all know exactly how each other feels. Thank you ladies for sharing your stories and experiences! I look forward to our next get together.

I was also the lucky recipient of a pink basket today. There is a woman on the Komen message boards who is a BC survivor who pays it forward and makes Baskets for Breast Cancer and sends them out to other women with breast cancer. Sara nominated Laura and I to receive one of her baskets filled with comfort items and goodies. It was quite a surprise! Thank you Sara for nominating me and thank you Chris for your thoughtful and touching gift! Barb also surprised us with cute pink bracelets with a pink ribbon charm on them. Thank you Barb!

After spending the day in Oshkosh we headed home as I needed to get back for the Homecoming pictures. Here is a photo of Natalie and Katie with their cute dresses on.

Friday, October 17, 2008

TGIF

I am always glad when the week ends and the weekend is here. That means sleeping in! (and I do love to sleep). John has the day off and is going deer hunting (his duck hunting trip had to be cancelled due to his brother's work obligations. I was disappointed as I like it when he leaves for a week). I am in the office all day. I am STILL working on the girl's dresses. I had to make some slight alterations (these girls are fussy :)) with the straps and hems. They will be done by tommorrow.

12 days until chemo. I am picking up my premeds today. I have three anti-nausea meds all taken at different times;Zofran, Ativan and Compazine. I hope they work. I also have to take a steroid (Dexamethasone) the day before and the day after chemo to prevent fluid retention (and we certainly don't want that).

Tommorrow..... a road trip to Oshkosh!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Healthy Eating

This was a post I pulled from the Susan Komen website boards. It has some great information regarding anti-cancer fighting foods and eating healthy in general. Some of it we already know and have heard before, but some of it for me was new information. I thought I would post it on my blog this morning.

I recently had a great nutrition consult at a big medical center/cancer center with a dietician who has a special interest in breast cancer. Thought I would pass along some of her recommendations. A lot of it is common sense, but it always means more to me when an expert reminds me it could help prevent a recurrence! AIM FOR 7+ FRUITS/VEGGIES EACH DAY. Include at least one from each of these groups daily.Cruciferous veggies: broccoli, cabbage, cauliflower, brussel sproutsLycopene-rich produce: tomatoes, watermelonBeta-carotene rich: sweet ptotatoes, carrots, pumpkin, winter squashCITRUS: whole orange rather than juiceBERRIES: especially blueberriesDARK GREEN LEAFY VEGGIES: spinach, kale, collards, romaineRefer to dirty dozen list and try to buy those organic 3-6 SERVINGS WHOLE GRAINS DAILY:brown rice, whole wheat pasta, 100% whole wheat bread and bagels, quinoa, oatmeal, whole grain crackers, cereals. INCREASE FIBER:whole grains as above, plus beans daily. Bread should have at least 2 grams fiber/slice and cereal at least 4 grams/fiber. Fiber might help lower estrogen levels and is good source of vitamins and minerals that lower overall cancer risk. MINIMIZE ANIMAL PRODUCTS:Aim for plant based protein sources like beans. All meat should be organic and chicken is better than beef. Avoid cured or smoked foods containing nitrates/nitrites. Fish is good- esp. salmon, trout, mackeral, albacore tuna, and sardines. Eggs should be from free range, unmedicated chickens. MINIMIZE ALCOHOL:3/4 - 1 drink daily increases risk by 9%. 2 or more drinks daily increases risk up to 41%. If you do drink, make sure you get at least 300 micrograms of folate daily which will decrease risk somewhat. Folate rich foods include spinach, orange juice, fortified cereals, beans. CHOOSE HEALTHIER FATS:Avoid trans fats - hard stick margarine, Crisco, fried chips, french fries, store bought baked goods. Reduce saturated fats: cheese, butter, ice cream, processed foods. Use monounsaturated oils: EVOO, canola oil, olive and canola based cooking sprays. Nuts, esp. walnuts and almonds are a good source of plant protein, fiber, and healthy fats- but watch portion size as they are caloric. Almond butter is great. MINIMIZE DAIRY:There is some evidence that the insulin growth factor present in dairy (not added, it comes straight from the cow) can contribute to hormonal cancers like breast and prostate. She likes rice, oat, and hemp milk (???). Cheese is the worst dairy as it is so high in fat and has a higher concentration of IGF. In moderation, organic low fat dairy is ok - esp. yogurt. Hard to get enough calcium though without dairy. Definitely splurge on organic for dairy though to avoid the hormones they give cows to increase milk production. DRINK 4 cups of green tea daily. High in EGCG which in the lab has been shown to inhibit breast cancer growth. EAT 1-2 cloves garlic daily if tolerated. Contains diallyl sulfide, a tumor suppressor. INCREASE WATER INTAKE: At least 48oz. daily. Invest in fliter that removes lead, flouride, chlorine. Other tips- whole fruit always better than juice. If need juice, best is pomegranate, tart cherry. Vitamin D is rally important- get about 15 minutes of early morning or late day sun with no sunscreen and gets levels checked regularly. Supplement if low. Super foods:beans, broccoli, cabbage, garlic, salmon, EVOO, almonds, walnuts, avocado, blueberries, oatmeal. I'll update as I remember more- I still have tons<

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Good morning!

Just to recap last night I went to book club for a short while. It was so great to see you guys!
I hope you picked a good book for next month.

Well, the junior girls lost to the senior girls ( pretty badly) but overall for only having 3 practices they actually played really well. It was really fun to see them playing. There were some laugh-out-loud moments watching girls play. LOL Natalie had a blast! She actually looked like she knew what she was doing out there and was able to pull a bunch of flags.

I am off to work today and then dinner with my friend Lynn to one of my favorite restaurants Bonefish Grill.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Plans for the Day

It is a tradition at the high school during Homecoming week to have the junior girls play the senior girls in a flag football game (Powderpuff game). Tonight is that game! The girls have had a few practices with their coaches (boys who volunteer basically) and have been having so much fun. As many of you know, Natalie's life over the past 9 years has been swimming. We have always encouraged her to try another sport. I never thought in a million years she would have fun playing flag football. LOL I hope she is not thinking of a scholarship in football for college. It should be a fun night. Let's hope the juniors beat those seniors!!

I also have book club tonight, so I will be making a short stop there tonight to visit with my girls before I head to the game. I basically will only be there for social hour, my favorite part. JK!
Looking forward to some good wine, food and conversation.

And.... for those of you who really want to know, I am hemming the dresses today. Woooohoooo.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Thought for the Day


You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.
~Eleanor Roosevelt

Sunday, October 12, 2008














Just a typical Sunday afternoon!!!


I am in the home stretch for the Homecoming dresses (with only 6 days to go!). Yahooo! I just have some minor adjustments to make on both dresses which will only take a few hours and they are done!!!

Next on the list is finishing my book club book which needs to get done by Tuesday.

Another absolutely beautiful day in Wisconsin. I think it may have hit 80 degrees here! Hope everyone is enjoying the last day of the weekend.